The day after the first date

Well, last night was our first date. It was almost perfect. He was perfect and I'm so ready to fall in love with him now. This morning when I walked into work I couldn't stop smiling. As the day wore on my lack of sleep caught up with me as I was hanging on to my last threads of sanity. He can't take his phone into work with him and since it's high security, it takes a long time to go in and out of the facility. He doesn't see his phone all day. Meaning, I don't hear from him all day. Of course, we've only had one date, but i know he's the one for me. Do you ever just get that feeling?? I keep looking at his picture and going "oh my God, he's so fucking hot! I am so lucky he likes me!"

It started over a week ago. On the night of my college graduation I went out to a bar downtown to celebrate with a friend. I saw him there and we kept looking back and forth at each other for some time. Eventually he got in line for a drink and I new that was the perfect opportunity to go and talk to him. So I did....and I found out that not only was he super cute, he was really nice and in the field I want to be when I get a decent job. After he got his drink he walked off, I didn't think he liked me. Later I wrote my name and number on a napkin (I forgot to ask his name!!) and with a lot of nudging from my friend I walked up to him and handed him a folded napkin with my number inside. I was super embarrassed and didn't think he like me at all. Turned out I was lucky and he did like me...he actually likes curvy women. yay.

So back to the story. I get obsessive when I really like a guy...and especially when I can't talk to him all day cuz he doesn't have any access to his phone...I was going crazy sent him like 6 or 7 texts...then more after he got off work and even after he told me he was busy...then I believe he got annoyed with me and then I was scared he wasn't going to like me anymore. Thankfully not....but then I went to a training for my new business and near the end I get 4 text messages from him saying that he's being shipped to iraq in about 3 weeks and he'd like to hang out with me throughout that time but will understand if I don't want to see him anymore. He also sent one saying he wasn't trying to be mean (about earlier when I thought he was super annoyed with me).

Soooo I really wanted to talk to him about this stuff tonight in person....but he wakes up super early for work and I kept him up really super late last night and he was exhausted today....at 9 o clock he was exhausted and still hadn't eaten dinner so I took pity on the poor guy and left him alone. meanwhile. I'm going crazy. I can't sleep and I have to stay home from work tomorrow bc my 2 year old has a fever. I have to wait all night and then all day tomorrow until he's off work to talk to him about how long he's supposed to be there, what he wants from me in the meantime and what he's really looking for. I would like nothing better than to spend as much time as possible with him right up until he leaves. I want to be his girl. I'm already obsessed and falling for him. This is after 1 day! I want to be there for him and support him when he goes. I want to be the girlfriend that writes every day and sends care packages of little things he likes every week. I want to do that for him..but it's wierd because we've only been on one date. I feel like if I tell him all this tomorrow....he'll be really weirded out. How can I show how I feel without scaring him??

He really is the best guy I've ever met. He's tall, wiry (not skinny), wears cute glasses, is incredibly sexy and he opens doors and came to pick me up for our date yesterday....even though he lived a lot closer to the restaurant than me...he wasted gas to pick me up and all...he's only 5 years older than me....lot better than before. He likes me and thinks I'm sexy. He has beautiful blue eyes, a smattering of tattoos. He's such a dream guy really...he has a real adult job and his own place. He has cats and really likes them. He's close with his mother. He is gorgeous, he's smart, he's funny and cute....I love everything about him. And of course, if he saw this blog he'd be gone in a second....so everyone be quiet okay?? I'll keep you posted as long as you don't tell him....

Wish me luck talking to him tomorrow.

PS am i pathetic or what...everytime I hear someone on the walkway outside I hope it's him coming over and surprising me by being here. I would love it...but I know it's not going to happen since he's so tired. I want him and need him....he's a good kisser too...soo sexy! ok I'm done...more news tomorrow tho!